Discovering The Home Within
Fourteen years ago, I made the weighted decision of leaving Toronto, the beautiful city I grew up in, to marry the love of my life and move to Manhattan. Naturally I was beyond thrilled to enter this new phase of my life with the man I love and totally fired up to be moving to NYC. I was hoping that the breadth of my excitement would outweigh the intensity of my anxiety about leaving everything that was familiar to me. To my dismay, stepping out of my safe cocoon and childhood home proved to be more challenging than I had imagined, prompting a less than smooth transition; one that would take me down, shake my world and ultimately reawaken my spirit.
At first I would blame my inner turmoil on the magnitude with which I missed my family. Next, on how challenging it was to meet new people who “got me” in this city. The list of excuses was endless. Looking back, I’m not sure how I could have expected others to understand me when I was struggling to truly know myself. With some much needed self reflection came the understanding that this difficult situation was my own creation, one that was my own doing, and undoing. How heartbreaking it is that we can give so much power to one false story – especially when we have it on repeat in our minds. It was enough to completely alter my reality. I would later learn that by giving that same power to a more desirable story and allowing that to become my inner dialogue, I would recondition my energetic state to manifest abundance and the peace of mind I so needed.
For years I would teeter-totter back and forth between momentary grand awakenings and fleeting falls from grace until this intuitive message became crystal clear: I was missing my friends, my family and my life back home, but what I had been missing most up until that point, was me. By finally calling out the challenge, I could surrender to my lifelong assignment of looking within and embarking on a journey of true self understanding and self compassion. Along with my willingness, came a dramatic shift in my perceptions, a significant career transition and a heart-centered community that I could share my new world with. The more I was able to uncover previously dormant parts of myself, the more I would attract a personal reality that was rooted in truth and synchronicity.
I called many extraordinary experiences into my life, but the most aligned and by far the most meaningful was where I met my soul family at Gabrielle Bernstein’s, miraculous Spirit Junkie Masterclass. I released into the experience and allowed myself to be embraced by this beautiful blanket of pure, unconditional love. This was the space where I would learn how to apply spiritual principles to elevate my understanding of the past, attain wisdom to mindfully manage my future and acquire the passage I needed to harmoniously dwell in the beauty that is now. This was home.
The universe does for us, what we cannot do for ourselves. This was the first of many lessons that Gabrielle, our divine teacher revealed. My life in Toronto was lovely, but ultimately devoid of personal growth, creative expansion, and benefaction; the elements that today comprise the air that I breathe. Creating a way for me to step away from the sheathe of my familiar environment was my detour in the right direction and ultimately the universe’s way of guiding me to live out the highest vision of my life. There was a more meaningful plan available to me that may have never been unveiled without my relocation.
If we want to feel supported, then we must first learn how to support ourselves. I had a pattern of looking outside of myself for things that I needed to first, bring forth, within myself. We cannot expect the love, compassion or support of another, if we are not capable of first providing them for ourselves. Gabrielle showed me how to lovingly acknowledge, validate and honor myself through practices of meditation, prayer, and gratitude. This was the gateway to accessing and finally trusting, my own intuition and relying on it to guide me back home, whenever I was off path.
We must use our unique voice to share our story. This was the principle that brought it all together for me and profoundly reinforced the collective scope of wisdom at the Spirit Junkie Masterclass. Recognizing the value in my unique story allowed me to open my heart and share my truth. In doing so, not only have I gained more clarity about my own journey, but I have been touched to hear how my voice has given others the faith to transform their own obstacles into triumphs.
On the first day of this training, Gabrielle affectionately vowed to be our wings until we had found our own. It was in the space of her loving presence and guidance that I declared to choose love over fear, every time. No move or life transition can threaten the deeply rooted energy of love that can only be found within me, unless I give it the power to do so. I now intimately recognize that my internal guidance system can always help me recover my sacred home within. I am grateful for the miracle of having finally found my own wings and I am beyond ready to soar.
To learn more about Gabrielle and her magical masterclass, visit www.spiritjunkies.com.
Written for The Huffington Post. See the original article here.